Fix the feeling .... and the 'fault' will take care of itself
It is all too easy to slip back into my old habit of 'fault finding' rather than really delving into the thoughts and feelings of the Driver. Unravelling the complexities that motivates behaviour is fascinating to me.
[example number 893.2. paragraph C.iii subsection e] 😉
It is all too easy to slip back into my old habit of 'fault finding' rather than really delving into the thoughts and feelings of the Driver. Unravelling the complexities that motivates behaviour is fascinating to me.
I really need to understand more from them... Fixing the feeling takes care of the 'faults' without a person feeling criticised or feeling resentment.
There is no effort involved in implementation either, because the incentive comes from within.
It is certainly more effort to 'fix a feeling' rather that just say,
"You are driving too slowly through this crossroads! You have priority - come on!! get a move on! You are doing 13 mph and there is no one around at all!! You can't keep doing this you know! You have got to sort this out. Come on - I will talk you through it"
I will admit this one took me quite a while!!!
To start with I did not mention anything at all about the junction. I began by asking what he liked about his drive so far, and asked specifically about a few things that I knew he had done very well indeed!
It turns out that this Driver needed to explain to me (or maybe they needed to hear themselves say) a few things like:
- "I need two seconds thinking time!" and
- "Oh yes - like it says in the HWC 'only a fool breaks the two second rule'! [I must admit, I am not used to New Drivers quoting that to me!! 😃 ]
- "I loved it when I parked up at the side of the road here because I did it differently this time. I planned it backwards... I looked at the raised kerb really far ahead .... hahahhaaaaa yeah! about 2 seconds ahead of me and worked backwards from there. I knew that van was behind me too. That is why the stop was so good and smooth. Everyone could anticipate my actions too! AND my braking was perfect!! 😃 "
A little further into the conversation I heard myself asking, "why do you think they put the road signs that far away from the crossroads or roundabout etc?"
"Oh yeah!' came the answer "sort of two seconds thinking time! Makes sense!"
"I like being predictable and I hate it when other people confuse me! I need to plan it ahead of time"
It turns out that this particular Driver needed to find his solution. His words. His descriptions. His working out. His phrases and thoughts to fix his fear of unpredictable people at junctions.
That was his feeling - fearful of other drivers pulling out at the last minute. There were many discussions and elaborations during that session.
His actions led to a multitude of improvements across the board in things like:
- appropriate approach speed towards and through junctions
- selecting appropriate gear before hazards (including bends and roundabouts)
- looking and planning well ahead
- scanning and being predictable to other road users
I could not unleash the power of that Driver unless he felt comfortable enough to explore and explain what was going on.
I am not suggesting that we don't have exactly the same results with our Drivers by identifying the faults and explaining what to do to correct them... what I am saying is that, in my opinion, I gain so much more by fixing the feelings rather than focusing on the faults.
[Fiona Taylor from Facebook October 2021]
Source & reference
Verified WordPress title: 'Fix the feeling .... and the 'fault' will take care of itself'. Verified WordPress publication date/time: 28 February 2025 at 10:02. Both verified directly against the original FionaDrive WordPress Posts screen. This is a distinct 2025 WordPress republication/reworking of Fiona Taylor's Facebook material from October 2021. It is NOT the same WordPress post as the separately published 21 October 2021 article of the same title, which exists as Base44 record 6a7f614541e13b71017a54c2 (published_date 2021-10-21). Both existed independently in WordPress and both exist independently in the migrated BlogPost archive. The two records must not be merged, overwritten or reconciled. The attribution '[Fiona Taylor from Facebook October 2021]' appears in the authoritative 2025 source and is preserved in the body. This establishes that the 2025 WordPress article republishes/reworks Fiona's earlier Facebook material. The BlogPost publication date remains 28 February 2025; it has not been replaced with October 2021. Historical YouTube URL preserved in the body and recorded here for provenance: https://youtu.be/-MfR1lKRzAc . The video has not been downloaded, re-hosted, transcribed, summarised or quoted. No inference has been made that Fiona created, narrated, produced or owns the video. No material from the video has been used to expand the article. WordPress/Facebook implementation markup removed: <!-- wp:... --> block comments, WordPress embed classes and wrappers (wp-block-embed, wp-embed-aspect-16-9, wp-has-aspect-ratio), the empty <a></a> element, the empty Facebook hyperlink paragraph, and Facebook emoji image markup (replaced with visible emoji characters). The YouTube embed was converted to a plain hyperlink preserving the original URL. No material has been imported from the 2021 WordPress version. In particular, 'towards me' has NOT been added (it is absent from this 2025 source). Fiona's grammar and punctuation have not been silently corrected. No em dashes introduced. Driver privacy: The driver is not named in this article. No attempt has been made to identify them. No age, location, test centre or other identifying details have been added. The driver's quoted speech is preserved as supplied. Feelings, fear and behaviour: Fiona's references to 'thoughts and feelings', 'fear of unpredictable people at junctions', 'internal incentive' and 'allowing the driver to find his own solution' are treated as Fiona's professional observations and historical wording. No psychological diagnoses, therapy terminology, neuroscience, behavioural-science claims or medical interpretations have been introduced. Historical driving content preserved as Fiona wrote it: crossroads, priority, 13 mph, two-second thinking time, Highway Code quotation ('only a fool breaks the two second rule'), raised kerb, selecting appropriate gear, scanning, planning, predictability. Not modernised into current DVSA guidance. No current driving-test requirements added. No article image is present in the supplied 2025 WordPress body. image_url is set to null. The image from the separate 2021 version has not been restored. No stock imagery substituted. No relationship to any current Workshop/Product; no explicit historical relationship exists.
Want to talk about this?
If something here resonates with your work, Fiona is always happy to continue the conversation.
Talk to Fiona